Posts Tagged ‘anxiety’

Do you need to forgive somebody?

Thursday, June 30th, 2011

Forgiving can change your view of life and can give you peace and contentment.

Everyone has been hurt by somebody and sometime in their lives. When you have been hurt, what have you done, have you carried the hurt around for years? Have you carried the anger with you, cursed that person and told everyone about what they have done to you. Where did all that get you? When you carry hurt and anger around with you, you are carrying poison which can hurt you mentally and physically. Forgiveness changes that.

Sometimes it is us that has done the hurting, and then we carry the guilt around with us, again this is poison and we need to forgive ourselves. Not forgiving yourself is as damaging as not forgiving someone else.

Forgiveness reduces:

Feeling of depression
Anxiety and stress
Anger and aggression
Blood pressure
Risk of drug or alcohol abuse

Forgiveness also helps your relationships with others, prevents the control that the other person has over your thoughts and it can improve your psychological health.

Forgiveness can be verbal, in your thoughts and through the written word (even if you burn or shred the letter and don’t send it).

Remember, as Alexander Pope said “To err is human; to forgive, divine”. Forgiving someone can change your outlook on life, giving you peace, removing bitterness, anger, resentment and pain. You can then move forward free from those restrictions.

Stress and how it can affect your body

Friday, February 11th, 2011

Not all stress is harmful.  There is a type of stress that is exciting and good for us, the type that we experience when skiing, doing an extreme sport or racing to meet an exciting deadline.  Acute short-term stress can also be good for us, but can be distressing, this can come when our skiing goes wrong or when somebody is angry and confronts us.  Some people seem to make that type of stress their way of life.

More harmful stress is often called Chronic Stress, this type seems to go on for ever and we cannot seem to escape from it.  It frequently occurs at work or in our home lives.  Chronic stress can cause physical symptoms like headaches and reduced immunity to infections.  If allowed to continue it can cause more serious problems like: depression, hair loss, heart disease, obesity, anxiety, sexual problems, ulcers and sleeplessness.

In order to cope with stress we need to look after our bodies and our minds.  Social support can be a great stress reliever and studies have shown that those who have strong support tend to be healthier, happier and less stressed. 

Many of us forget to take care of ourselves; a massage, a long relaxing bath, a healthy diet and exercise can all help prevent chronic stress.   Having a well-cared-for body can make you feel good about yourself and your life; it also conveys to others that you value yourself.  Remember, people who neglect themselves are at danger of unhappiness and low self-esteem.  Sometimes people who spend their time taking care of others can be at risk of burn out.  Taking time to care for yourself can make you a better carer for others.   

If you are struggling with stress, consider visiting a local counsellor, joining a meditation group, taking up yoga and doing everything you can to protect your health and wellbeing.

Remember to take time to smell the flowers……

Walking – good for your body and your mind

Tuesday, September 28th, 2010

A number of my clients are struggling with stress and anxiety in one form or another.  Many have found that just simply walking is a wonderful way of relieving stress whilst at the same time keeping their body fit.

Walking is simple you don’t need an instructor or a coach, it is inexpensive and can be done nearly anywhere and at any time.  So why not just get up and walk.   It doesn’t need to take too long, just walk for ten minutes in one direction and then ten minutes back again.   Why not walk with a friend?

The benefits for your body are improved balance and co-ordination.  Walking is good for your spine too and it can improve fitness and help to keep your weight down.  It can also decrease bone loss and improve circulation. 

The benefit for your mind is that it can improve your mood, energy level and alertness, thus helping to reduce stress.  Remember to breathe deeply and walking ‘mindfully’ – notice your surroundings, notice the sounds around you and how you move.   Think positive thoughts and count your blessings as you walk.   This is just one simple way of helping to improve your wellbeing – I hope you enjoy your next walk – please remember to wear comfortable shoes and dress for the weather.

Anxiety Disorder and OCD – The importance of support from the family.

Thursday, August 19th, 2010

I have recently been talking with a friend who has a family member with OCD and thought I would write something about this on my blog. 

If you have somebody in your family who is struggling with Anxiety Disorder and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) you will find an Article on this site providing some further thoughts on the topic.  Please remember that your relative is a person in their own right.  A person who is healthy and able in many ways, but who nonetheless has a disorder.

Do not allow the OCD to take over your family life, keep stress low and the families life as normal as possible. 

For people with OCD to make progress towards recovery you must resist helping in their ritual behaviour. 

When talking about the behaviour with the person effected, don’t criticise past behaviour, state what you want to happen in the future.  Avoid making any criticism personal and help your relative to feel accepted.

Remember, gentle humour alongside care can really help.  Support from you doesn’t always have to be serious.  People struggling with OCD often know how silly their fear is and they can often see the funny side of their behaviour as long as they feel that you are laughing with them not at them.   The humour should not be disrespectful.  

The way you react to the family member and their symptoms can have a huge impact.  Negative comments and/or criticism can make the disorder worse.  It is important to keep calm and provide a supportive environment.  There is no point in getting angry with somebody who has OCD or telling them to just stop.  They can’t and the extra pressure from you and others will probably make the behaviour worse.  Be kind and be patient, focus on the positive and praise any success.

Finally, remember you and other family members may need support and help too.  Find somebody to confide in whether it is a friend, your GP or a counsellor.